Called to Relationship

I will begin by saying as a layman, I affirm the statements in the BoD concerning the expression of human sexuality. So, allow me to set up a scenario that until recently has troubled me.

A person begins attending church. They attend for a number of weeks truly appear to be seeking a restored relationship with God and demonstrate a truly penitent heart. They then have some discussions with leadership. They then introduce their partner -- a person of the same sex. By all indications they are moving in a trajectory that would typically lead to a deeper commitment within the community of faith. What is the reaction when this person requests to join the church? It seems easy to say that church membership could not be extended to a person who is living a lifestyle incompatible with Christian teaching and by extension, Christian living? It seems in this case we should encourage a person to live a life that is in agreement with the teaching of Christ in marriage being between a man and a woman and that the two will become one flesh.

What bothered me for some time in this scenario is that essentially two people who have committed to one another are being asked to put aside an element of that commitment, a relationship is being broken. This seems to be a steep price to pay in breaking one relationship to repair another. However... as those seeking to repair our relationship with our creator we are in fact setting back to the one true relationship to which we created to fulfill. All other relationships are in fact secondary to our personal relationship with God.

 But what about that other relationship we are asked? As Christians, we are told that we must deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Jesus. This denial of self applies to each of us. For the adulterer, for the liar, for the thief, for the self absorbed, for the manipulator, for the self abuser -- each of us is called to deny ourselves. This is not a unique requirement for the homosexual, it is in fact the requirement of all who would follow Christ. Does it come with a price -- doesn't any thing of value come at some price? We were bought with a price, a price that was impossibly high for us to pay. Let us not cheapen grace by assuming that we can get by without any personal sacrifice.

 I would also argue that this applies in the case of abortion. I have heard many who would desire to live after Christ say that abortion is a personal right of women. I would only offer that if you are talking about personal rights, you are not talking about a full commitment to the call of Christ. If you think you have a right to your own body, then you are denying the full sacrifice of Christ. I read a quote recently by RC Sproul Jr. that goes, "If the lesson you get from Jesus hanging with sinners is you should hang more with sinners, you're confused on who you are in the story."  This seems to apply in this case, you can't take up the mantle of Christ as in this quote one day to hang with sinners and in the next declare your own rights.  You either love under the rule of Christ or not.  It isn't a smorgasbord where we get to pick what feels comfortable and we leave what causes discomfort.  Christ could have skipped ahead to the resurrection but he chose to submit to the fullness of sacrifice for our us.  Let's not cheapen grace by thinking we can help ourselves to the pleasure and none of the pain.

Perhaps the person in the scenario will be called to forgo a life of sexual fulfillment if they can never overcome same sex attraction. But to say that to have true love requires sexual intimacy is then to deny an intimate relationship with God. The height of love will never be demonstrated in a sexual relationship, to demand it must be is to obscure the gospel and to make our relationship with God as something other than the ultimate calling on our life.

I will close by quoting someone else, I wish I knew who it was -- "I am not called to heterosexuality, I am called to holiness."